Sisterhood of the Full Moon

It is the full moon and everyone around here is on their moon cycle.  Well, the ladies at least.  Goddesses I guess is what you call them.  Anyway, some are full mooners and some are new mooners, but no matter how you look at it, it’s the moon that’s causing it.  I’m a new mooner, but I’m desperately trying to become a full mooner.  I sleep under a skylight in order to expose myself to as much moonlight as I can, hoping it will penetrate my pineal gland or realign my second chakra so that I can join the sisterhood of the full moon.  Full mooning is better I hear because it is the more natural alignment for our bodies.  If you start bleeding on the full moon, then you and the moon will both be slowly shedding at the same time.  You and the moon will become like one, mirrors.  Mirrors are all the rage with Goddesses on their moon cycle.  Not the looking glass mirrors.  Metaphysical mirrors.  Like I see the me-ness in you and you mirror the me-ness in you back to me and the reflection of my me-ness in the mirror of my eyes allows me to reflect my light more, like the moon.  The moon is just a big ol’ mirror.  Anyway if you’re a new mooner like me, then you are going against the flow of the moon, shedding while it is growing and you will never be happy or in proper alignment.  If you’re a new mooner you’re probably not a Goddess at all.  What kind of Goddess would go against the entire flow of nature and the universe?  No Goddess.  No good Goddess anyway, except for maybe Kali – but she’s ugly and no one really wants to be Kali – unless you are really angry and want to smash things to pieces because you have raging PMS due to misaligning your moon cycle with the new moon and not the full moon.  I think the full moon tribe began in antiquity on the plains of Africa.  The plains of Africa are where we humans did most of our evolving, apparently.  The moon effect, let’s call it that, the moon effect made sure no one man could knock up all the ladies at once.  If everyone is on the same moon cycle then there’s no way one man could go around inseminating every woman in the tribe on the one night of the month they were all ovulating.  Genetic diversity.  Ovulation, if done right, should be a new moon activity.  As for me, right now I’m dropping eggs on the full moon and bleeding on the new moon.  And I am so ashamed.


About audreyryan

semi-pro rogue theatre critic
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